May 22, 2013

SECRET REGRET OF THE DAY: May 22, 2013

I regret having depression. I wake up everyday dreading getting out of bed. If I didn't have children to care for I would never get up. I think of taking my own life everyday. The feeling is so overwhelming that some days I just don't know if I'm going to make it. I have no energy and I get easily adjetated. I have been on medication for 6 mths and nothing has changed. I hate feeling this way and I can't control it at all. I pray for good every night that I don't wake up the next morning. I love my family so much but I can't fix myself. Sometimes I think they would be better without me!!

May 21, 2013

Secret Regrets Featured On CBS New York News!

Secret Regrets and PostSecret were just featured on CBS New York news! Thanks to Secret Regrets fan Judy for bravely sharing her story -- click below to watch the video clip to see how revealing her secret regret changed her life. 

SECRET REGRET OF THE DAY: May 21, 2013

I regret believing her for so long when I knew she was having an affair. I just wanted to believe nothing was wrong, that she wouldn't do such a thing. 11 years of marriage tends to cloud your judgement I suppose. I regret waiting so long to call her out on her affair. I regret not trusting myself and having the confidence to confront her. I regret giving her a second chance. She moved out "to find herself" and I regret holding out hope she would come back.

Most of all, I regret not realizing sooner that she wasn't trying and she didn't care.

M/43 divorced

May 20, 2013

SECRET REGRET OF THE DAY: May 20, 2013

There is a part of me that wishes you well in life, that is not the part I regret. I regret wishing you negativity. Although you stripped me down to nothing two years ago.. i spent two years of my life over analyzing every last detail attempting to figure out what went wrong. I spent two years of my life picking up the pieces and trying to fit them all back together. I spent countless hours thinking of our relationship and wishing that for every time you hurt me mentally and physically there would be someone in your life to return the favor or destroying your self esteem and self worth. But after two years of this fictional world i would drift off into i am finally content with my life. I am finally happy & i regret wishing you sorrow...i regret letting you influence my life even with the absence of your presence. I am finally free!!

May 19, 2013

SECRET REGRET OF THE DAY: May 19, 2013

I regret doing what I did to you. I regret thinking someone else was better than what we had. Even more-so, I regret not telling you the whole story. Every day I wish it never happened. I cannot picture myself without you; although it's no excuse. I will carry this burden with me until the day I die, because the day I die I pray I'll still be with you.

May 18, 2013

SECRET REGRET OF THE DAY: May 18, 2013

I regret not having confidence in myself, not living my life to the fullest and being too afraid to approach women for fear of rejection. I'll be 30 this year and I've never been in a relationship.

May 17, 2013

SECRET REGRET OF THE DAY: May 17, 2013

I loved you. I still loved you and you didn't know, and now you will never know because of my stupid mistakes. The day you committed suicide was the day that I thought of you the most, the day I read what you wrote to me and wrote letters I was too afraid to send. The next day was the one where I found out that you killed yourself. You took with you the parts of me that only you knew and you buried them with you. You took my heart. I wish there was a more poetic, beautiful way to say this, but the simple truth is that I miss you. I miss your smile, your little giggle and the way you said "I love you, dear," and how you knew just what to say when I was thinking of ending my life. I just miss you, Aggie, and the thing I will forever regret most is not keeping in touch and letting you know that I still love you.
RIP, my dearest Aggie, and I hope you've found your home.

May 16, 2013

SECRET REGRET OF THE DAY: May 16, 2013

I regret ruining our friendship by loving you. We were best friends, practically since birth, but I had to screw it up because I had feelings for you. Sure, we're still young, and anything could happen, but when I found out you love her, I didn't understand. What does she have that I don't? I'll never be more than a friend to you, and it hurts a lot more than you know. You thought it was just a crush, but still, ignoring me for two months now? I wish I didn't love you.

May 15, 2013

SECRET REGRET OF THE DAY: May 15, 2013

Today I found an old message you sent me... part of it read,

"As long as i'm alive, i'll always protect you"

I regret not making you go to the doctors sooner when I was worried it could be something worse...

Maybe then I wouldn't be racked with guilt...

Maybe then you'd still be alive.

Why couldn't I protect you like you did for me!

May 14, 2013

SECRET REGRET OF THE DAY: May 14, 2013

I can't make her leave him and I give up. I'm sorry that you are OK with being hit and pushed around and constantly cover for him. Your parents are worried, I am worried. You never come to class anymore and you were on scholarship. I hate seeing your life being destroyed by this man and that you won't listen to me when I try to help. I don't lecture you, I listen and I try to be helpful but I can't sit around and watch him treat you like this anymore. I am walking away and leaving it up to YOU to decide when enough is enough. I'm sorry I can't be a better friend and stick around but maybe me leaving will be just what you need to realize what you have truly lost. I am leaving this up to God and you now because anything I say to you or your family won't change what YOU do. I pray and will continue to pray for your safety and finding the strength to leave him but I am not going to listen to another complaint about him when you have the power to leave. Goodbye Chelsea, I will be here for you when you decide to leave him for good but I am not sitting around hearing you go on about how awful he is and then turn around and stay with him. It is your life and I will gladly be a part of it when J. is gone. I love you please leave him.

May 13, 2013

SECRET REGRET OF THE DAY: May 13, 2013

Gina, Michelle, Amanda, and your child:

I'm so sorry that I thought, "They're long dead," every time I saw your pictures. I wanted to believe you were alive, but my cynical nature wouldn't allow me to hold onto that hope for you. I feel like I failed you. I sincerely hope that you ladies can recover from the horrors of your ordeal and find the peace and happiness you deserve.

Male, 39
Cleveland, Ohio

May 12, 2013

SECRET REGRET OF THE DAY: May 12, 2013

My biggest regret is not letting my mom know how much I truly care, at least in the way that she needed. I watched her struggle with depression and try hard to make things work especially in relationships. She tried for years to be happy and make sure that I had some father figure in my life after my dad left us. I watched her stay with a man who only used, abused and repeatedly cheated on her because she craved acceptance and love. In the end though she would always forgive him and let it go, until one day he finally had no use for her anymore. He kicked us out and we were homeless and poor, yet she never let me go without. She worked as hard as she could to be a good mom and I still wouldn't accept her. I blamed her for the things he did and the way he treated her. I thought "well clearly it's what she wants because she keeps going back". When she met someone knew I backed off because I wanted her to be happy but I saw the cycle begin again and I did nothing. I watched her slip back into a depression especially after we lost my sister, and I again rejected her. I became disgusted by her because I expected more from her. I wanted her to be strong, but what I didn't see is that she needed me. I made her feel stupid for trying to be happy, but in all honesty that is all I wanted for her. I regret not being able to help her recognize how I really felt and I wish I would've let her into my life more. I no longer live at home, this was to spite her,and I rarely talk to her. I miss my mom, I wish I would've been more understanding of her feelings. I didn't show her that she was doing fine on her own. She raised me to be strong willed and independent. I find it difficult to talk to her because when I do I just become frustrated. I love my mom but I regret not being able to recognize that she has feelings and needs too. I regret being so selfish.

May 11, 2013

SECRET REGRET OF THE DAY: May 11, 2013

I regret that a hustler, swindler, and VERY POSSIBLE CHILD MOLESTER, is still the active pastor of a church.

I regret that many people who know about it, act as if it was the child's fault.

I regret that the child was too afraid to tell her mother when it first started (about age 13), even though she tried to tell her once.

I regret that many people still worship this sick man as if he is God or Holy.

May 10, 2013

SECRET REGRET OF THE DAY: May 10, 2013

There are many regrets that have horribly influenced my life. I have narrowed it down to my top ten:

10.Saying, "no" to modeling
9. Switching from Verizon to AT&T to Sprint
8. Quitting gymnastics
7. Bumping **'s car slightly only to have her sue me
6. My poor posture
5. Buying a house in an mediocre part of town
4. The eating habits I followed until age 24
3. Waiting 6 years after undergrad to start grad school
2. Moving to NC to be a teacher
1. Going to Grove City College

May 9, 2013

SECRET REGRET OF THE DAY: May 9, 2013

I regret the night I got so wasted some guy was able to take advantage of me. As a man I should have said or done something to prevent it. I wish I could learn to trust people again, but what I regret most of all is that I couldn’t and still can't talk about it. I regret that in my anger, I pushed all my friends away.

Male/24

May 8, 2013

SECRET REGRET OF THE DAY: May 8, 2013

I regret taking you for granted. I regret marrying this douchebag for my parents sake. I regret behaving so foolishly with you. I loved you. I love you. You've found someone else. It hurts that i was once the center of your universe...and now? A speck of dust in the landscape of your life. I should have stood up for my love. I don't know why i buckled under my parents pressure. Now i'm in a loveless, emotionally abusive marriage. He hates my parents despite their kindness. He's nothing like you. We picked names together for our kids...my husband didn't even ask me about that, let alone consider it. I have a son now. I find myself wishing you were his father, far too many times. We had an epic love. You always said that...when i was breaking up with you, when you tried to mend things...you always said we were amazing, perfection for each other. I didn't listen. But you were right. As always, you were right. No one will ever be close to what you were. I lied, i was vicious and mean...i'm getting my punishment now. I miss your kisses, the way you looked at me...i felt loved, truely, wholly and purely loved. I regret so much.

May 7, 2013

SECRET REGRET OF THE DAY: May 7, 2012

I regret devoting my faith, my life, my sacrifices, and my heart to a man who didn't have the capacity to love me as deeply. If he did then nothing in this world would make him happier than being a part of his sons life, their milestones, watch their personalities form, see them grow and cherish those memories- and the thought of missing out on that is unbearable. It turns out that he is so coldblooded- he could easily fill the void with material things.
I regret not detecting this unfaithful weakness in him before starting a family and a life with him- that he so easily deserted.

I regret being so much more devoted to a man who would never be as devoted to me- or our two beautiful sons. It must be nice to just easily get over the fact you will miss out on everything of the kids growing up with a fancy recliner and video game crap. Money this, money that, money is the thing that makes me happy- happier than seeing my sons take their first steps, get on the bus to their first day of school, going to their sport events, watching them graduate, etc.
There is no amount of money or fancy things that would be equivalent to the happiness my sons give me. I would rather die than miss out on watching my sons grow up.
I regret YOU- you deadbeat deserter!

May 6, 2013

SECRET REGRET OF THE DAY: May 6, 2013

There are times when I do look back...to the time that there was an US. Reminiscing on the places we went together everytime I go to those same places with my friends. Your named being mention every now and then when a topic comes up because you're the first person that comes to mind. The joys and arguments we shared together that only we understood because, we were together. To tell you the truth, I don't know what happened to US. I always wonder here and there, "What went wrong?" And then I remembered. That was phase of always doing things together as one, diminished to nothing. Harsh, but that's how I felt becuase that I had this urgent need to get out. I wanted to get out. I wanted to do things without worrying about another person. I wanted to do things without constantly checking in to that person. I don't how clearer I can get than because obviously, I wanted freedom. Then, you wanted me to give you MORE time for you knowing very well that I was balancing work, school, family and you. Trying to tend to the needs of each category that needed tending. You wanted me to stop talking to one of my friends from highschool because you were getting jealous. You made it seem so easy, and when I told you that I stopped talking to her, your response to me was, "good!" I realized that US didn't exist anymore. You & I did. We both wanted different things for ourselves and we both felt like we couldn't do things freely when it came to deciding because in a way, we held each other back. Eventually, I got tired and weary of what YOU & I have become, so I did it. I let let go of something that honestly, at one point, meant the world to me. Months have passed and I feel fantastic! People always give me a look of confusion when I tell them that because it so unnatural for someone to feel that way after a breakup. Well, I learned to embrace a love that surpasses my knowledge. I let the love of God fill my cup constantly to the point that I felt suffice with what I had and not focus on what I have lost. Gods love is what healed me and saved me so much pain. But, I'm not perfect. I often wonder, " What if I kept going? Would I still be the same person now I f I was still in that relationship? Would have my perspective of GOD still be the same?" Everytime I think about her, I always feel some happy inside. Reminiscing all the good times we spent together conversing on our thoughts of certain ideas, plans for our next trip, and even US. Renew our reasons to why we fell in love with each other. What was the first thing that caught our eye? Tell eachother what we first thought when we were introduced to each other? What I regret Is the future happiness that we could have had, the constant hugs and kisses we shared when we were just together for a few hours, and finally, not seeing you anymore. It's funny because all our friends are the same and checkup on each other indirectly through them. I'm glad to hear that you are doing so well now. Doing what you Gotta do get ahead in life. When i remember everything we shared between US, I can't help but wonder...what if....

May 5, 2013

SECRET REGRET OF THE DAY: May 5, 2013

I regret trusting you, we've known each other since elementary school then we decided to start sleeping together. There were no feelings just a 7 month long sex relationship, but now I'm pregnant and you won't step up. I don't want a relationship with you, I'm sorry my birth control failed but please just be a part of this childs life! Every child deserves to have a father you had one growing up as did I. Why doesn't your child deserve the same? Regret is a powerful thing, and down the line I fear yours will far outweigh mine. I need help and support as well, not as a lover but perhaps as a friend? Together as friends we can do this it's not as bad as you're making it out to be. Don't let this be your biggest regret.

May 4, 2013

SECRET REGRET OF THE DAY: May 4, 2013

My biggest regret has been shutting my dad out. He was an abusive alcoholic to the point where my family lived in a hotel. I learned at a young age to cut him out due to the harm he placed on my family. I was notified that he was getting better, but I never forgave him enough to speak to him. He called me two days after my birthday and said happy birthday with the wrong age. i response was i hate you feel free to die, this was the last thing i ever said to my dad that was trying to reach out to his daughter. i spent everyday with him when i was little, which was about 8 years ago. I looked up to him and loved him. He was my preferred parents when i was little.He died two years ago with the words i hate you feel free to die as the last memory and conversation we had. I regret not letting him know he had my heart and was the only man that will have it. I love my daddy sooo much and i wish i could just tell him once that i truly love him. I am stubborn, just like him, but I will always be daddy's little girl. He is looking down at me now, and i know one day ill see him up in the sky and get to give him that longing hug and i love you. Never waste time with how you feel, someday you wont get the chance to let that person know that not only do they mean the world to you, but they are your world.